michele willens
2 min readSep 21, 2023

Malibu’s Troubled Summer

By Michele Willens

It’s not enough that battling forces are keeping movies and television shows off our screens. Now, Hollywood’s famous beach retreat is threatening to keep thousands of charitable folks from swimming, running, and biking.

No, not because of A.I. But because of a fish!

There are several ways to look at the controversy surrounding Malibu’s annual — and suddenly threatened — triathlon, scheduled for September 30 and October 1. One is that the City Council members must think they are in an episode of “Parks And Rec.” The other is that environmental wokeness may have gone a tad too far.

Here are the details: the triathlon is at risk of being canceled due to a flooded underpass on the course. And that underpass has turned out to be a refuge for tidewater goby, which are native to lagoons and marshes along the California coast. To alter the course, a city law requires that nearby residents must be notified 32 days beforehand. To make such a change now, (in part to save those non-human swimmers) would be virtually impossible, as we are less than two weeks away from opening day.

At the most recent meeting, the notification deadline had passed, and city officials temporarily denied a permit for the triathlon. This will come to a head Monday night, when race organizers will present other route alternatives, and, hopefully, a few stubborn council members agree to put that 32-day law aside. Stay tuned.

Know that this event draws more than 4,000 participants from around the world . (Including teams consisting of employees from Disney, Warner Bros. and Netflix)It raises millions of dollars for children’s hospitals, in particular.

A possible cancellation would put a final point on what has been a strange summer in Malibu. Its most famous eatery, Nobu, (founded by Robert DeNiro) was fined following a July 4 bash, for allowing valets to park the cars of the rich and famous in the middle of the highway. And it is currently facing a pair of sexual harassment suits. Last we checked, they have no tidewater gobi on the menu, but that could change.

And let’s not forget the city’s body in the barrel. Yes, on August 5, a strange large item was discovered in the Malibu lagoon. When the lifeguard looked inside, the dead body of a 32-year old rap singer was discovered. That case has still not been solved.

All this aside, Malibu remains a top destination for tourists, and a full or part-time haven for countless performers, (Streisand, Sting, Flea, Jonah Hill, Michael Keaton, Andrew Garfield) executives (Larry Ellison, Serjey Brin) and professional athletes. (John McEnroe, the now-recuperating Aaron Rodgers, and three-time Hockey Hall of Famer Chris Chelios. He is Currently asking $75 million for his beachfront estate.)

When Malibu’s one movie theatre in town closed several years ago, I wrote a piece calling on Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks — two local homeowners — to save it. No luck. We shall now see if the city’s officials will save Malibu’s most cherished event.

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michele willens

michele willens writes for many publications. she lives in NYC.